Five facts that one should reflect on often

I have noticed that most of us tend to live oblivious of some simple truths that, if held closer to our everyday consciousness, would have a strong impact on the way we live our lives.

Please take a few moments to consider the following:

There are these five facts that one should reflect on often, whether one is a woman or a man, lay or ordained. Which five?

"I am subject to aging, have not gone beyond aging." This is the first fact that one should reflect on often...

"I am subject to illness, have not gone beyond illness"...

"I am subject to death, have not gone beyond death"...

"I will grow different, separate from all that is dear and appealing to me"...

"I am the owner of my actions (kamma), heir to my actions, born of my actions, related through my actions, and have my actions as my arbitrator. Whatever I do, for good or for evil, to that will I fall heir"...

These are the five facts that one should reflect on often, whether one is a woman or a man, lay or ordained.

Now, based on what line of reasoning should one often reflect... that "I am subject to aging, have not gone beyond aging"? There are beings who are intoxicated with a [typical] youth's intoxication with youth. Because of that intoxication with youth, they conduct themselves in a bad way in body... in speech... and in mind. But when they often reflect on that fact, that youth's intoxication with youth will either be entirely abandoned or grow weaker...

Now, based on what line of reasoning should one often reflect... that "I am subject to illness, have not gone beyond illness"? There are beings who are intoxicated with a [typical] healthy person's intoxication with health. Because of that intoxication with health, they conduct themselves in a bad way in body... in speech... and in mind. But when they often reflect on that fact, that healthy person's intoxication with health will either be entirely abandoned or grow weaker...

Now, based on what line of reasoning should one often reflect... that "I am subject to death, have not gone beyond death"? There are beings who are intoxicated with a [typical] living person's intoxication with life. Because of that intoxication with life, they conduct themselves in a bad way in body... in speech... and in mind. But when they often reflect on that fact, that living person's intoxication with life will either be entirely abandoned or grow weaker...

Now, based on what line of reasoning should one often reflect... that "I will grow different, separate from all that is dear and appealing to me"? There are beings who feel desire and passion for the things they find dear and appealing. Because of that passion, they conduct themselves in a bad way in body... in speech... and in mind. But when they often reflect on that fact, that desire and passion for the things they find dear and appealing will either be entirely abandoned or grow weaker...

Now, based on what line of reasoning should one often reflect... that "I am the owner of my actions(kamma), heir to my actions, born of my actions, related through my actions, and have my actions as my arbitrator. Whatever I do, for good or for evil, to that will I fall heir"? There are beings who conduct themselves in a bad way in body... in speech... and in mind. But when they often reflect on that fact, that bad conduct in body, speech, and mind will either be entirely abandoned or grow weaker...

Now, a disciple of the noble ones considers this: "I am not the only one subject to aging, who has not gone beyond aging. To the extent that there are beings — past and future, passing away and re-arising — all beings are subject to aging, have not gone beyond aging." When he/she often reflects on this, the [factors of the] path take birth. He/she sticks with that path, develops it, cultivates it. As he/she sticks with that path, develops it and cultivates it, the fetters are abandoned, the obsessions destroyed.

Further, a disciple of the noble ones considers this: "I am not the only one subject to illness, who has not gone beyond illness"... "I am not the only one subject to death, who has not gone beyond death"... "I am not the only one who will grow different, separate from all that is dear and appealing to me"...

A disciple of the noble ones considers this: "I am not the only one who is owner of my actions, heir to my actions, born of my actions, related through my actions, who has my actions as my arbitrator; who — whatever I do, for good or for evil, to that will I fall heir. To the extent that there are beings — past and future, passing away and re-arising — all beings are the owner of their actions, heir to their actions, born of their actions, related through their actions, and have their actions as their arbitrator. Whatever they do, for good or for evil, to that will they fall heir." When he/she often reflects on this, the [factors of the] path take birth. He/she sticks with that path, develops it, cultivates it. As he/she sticks with that path, develops it and cultivates it, the fetters are abandoned, the obsessions destroyed.

From: "Beyond Coping: III. Heedfulness", by Thanissaro Bhikkhu. Access to Insight, May 26, 2010, http://www.accesstoinsight.org/lib/study/aids/heedfulness.html

I have even added a counter to my iGoogle page, to remind myself of how many years are left until I arrive to my average life expectancy. Extremely grounding.

A relationship with yourself?

In The Power of Now, Eckhart Tolle offers dozens of opportunities to the alert reader, to dis-identify with the mind and jump into the realm of consciousness.

His different attempts - answers to questions that were posed to him -, manage to pierce the shield of mind surrounding consensual perceptions, and give the reader a glimpse of a deeper state of being.

Still, each of us may respond in different degrees to those attempts. Personally, I have found the following fragment specially efficient in pointing at a state of consciousness free from mind:

But do you need to have a relationship with yourself at all? When you have a relationship with yourself, you have split yourself into two: "I" and "myself", subject and object. That mind-created duality is the root cause of all unnecessary complexity, of all problems and conflict in your life. In the state of enlightenment, you are yourself - "you" and "yourself" merge into one. You do not judge yourself, you do not feel sorry for yourself, you are not proud of yourself, you do not love yourself, you do not hate yourself, and so on. The split caused by self-reflected consciousness is healed, its curse removed. There is no "self" that you need to protect, defend, or feed anymore. When you are enlightened, there is one relationship that you no longer have: the relationship with yourself. Once you have given that up, all your other relationships will be love relationships.

Living on the Edge

From At Home in the Muddy Water, by Ezra Bayda

On the first day of a four-day meditation retreat, a student went in to see the Zen master with whom he'd been studying for many years. Sitting at the teacher's feet, he asked, "Can you tell me how I'm doing in my practice?" The Zen master thought for a minute, then said, "Open your mouth.” The student opened his mouth, and the teacher peered in and said, "OK, now bend your head down.” The student bent his head down, and the Zen master looked into his hair, then said, "OK, now open your eyes really wide.” The student opened his eyes, and the Zen master glared into them and said, "You're doing fine.” Then he rang his bell.

Because the teacher rang his bell, the student had to leave. The next day, he returned, quite perplexed by what had happened the day before. "I asked you how I was doing in my practice yesterday," he said, "and you made me open my mouth, bend my head, and open my eyes. What did all that have to do with my practice?" The Zen master bowed his head in thought. Then he said, "You know, you're not really doing very well in your practice, and the truth is, I am not sure you are ever going to make it.” Again he rang his bell.

The student walked out. You can imagine how confused and angry he felt. The next day he went back, still fuming, and said, "What do you mean, I'm not going to make it in practice? Do you know that I sit in meditation for an hour every day? Sometimes I sit twice a day. I come to every retreat. I have really deep experiences. What do you mean I'm not going to make it?" The master just sat there, apparently thinking. Then he said, "Well, maybe I made a mistake. Perhaps you're doing pretty well after all.” And again he rang his bell.

On the last day of the retreat, the student went back to see his teacher, utterly exhausted. He felt distraught and confused, but he was no longer fighting it. He said to the master, "I just wanted to know how I was doing in my practice.” This time, the teacher looked at him and with no hesitation, in a very kind voice, said, "If you really want to know how you're doing in your practice, just look at all of your reactions over the last few days. Just look at your life.”

It's important to have a daily meditation practice, to have a developing ability to see thoughts clearly, and to reside in our bodily experience. But having deep experiences during meditation is not enough. If we want to know how we're doing in our practice, we have to examine our life. Unless we begin to connect it with the rest of our life, our practice - however strong, calm, or enjoyable - ultimately will not be satisfying.

The reason it won't be satisfying is that we're ignoring one of the three basic pillars of practice. The first pillar is a daily sitting practice, in which we slowly develop both the strength and the willingness to do what we've spent our whole lives avoiding: reside in the physical reality of the present moment. The second pillar is the more intensive training offered in retreats, which pushes us in a way that we rarely push ourselves at home. There is no substitute for the learning we can do at retreats - where our illusions are dismantled and the real value of perseverance becomes evident. The third pillar is practicing with the messy, unromantic, ordinary ups and downs of daily life. This pillar is essential to a genuine practice. Without it, we will never truly be satisfied.

However, understanding the connection between practice and the rest of our life means addressing many different concerns. For instance, how are you practicing in your relationships - with your spouse, your children, your parents, the people at work? How many resentments do you still hold on to? Do the same people as ever in your life trigger anger, contempt, or other believed judgments? To what extent can you say, "I'm sorry," and really mean it? When a problem arises, can you say yes to practicing with it, even when you hate what's happening? And when criticism comes at you, are you willing to work with your reactions when they arise, instead of justifying them?

The answers to questions like these give us the measure of our practice. This measure is nothing magical or mysterious. It's simply the increasing ability to know what our life is, as well as the growing understanding that to practice with our life means to practice with everything we meet. Practice isn't just about sitting on a cushion trying to feel calm.

It is not at all uncommon for students to ask their teachers to measure their practice for them. The question itself, if we're not aware of what we're really asking, is already one small measure of where we are. Asking "How am I doing in my practice?" is like asking "Am I OK?" or "Am I acceptable the way I am?"

A friend recently told me she learned three things about herself in assessing her practice: She was addicted to her thinking, she was attached to her emotions, and she didn't want to stay in the present moment for more than a few seconds at a time. This might sound like familiar bad news, but is there really any problem with this? At least there's awareness of where she's stuck. What is unfortunate is believing our judgments and discouraging thoughts about what we see - "I'm a bad student," "I'll never really change," and so on.

We all want to change, to make our lives better. What we don't realize is that most transformative changes are slow and almost imperceptible; we continue to believe that our lives should be significantly different after practicing for only a few years. But it's not as if we go in to see a teacher, full of our fears, and come out fearless! Nor can we go to a retreat full of confusion, have a deep experience, and then remain permanently clear. We would like to see dramatic changes, but this isn't how practice works. Sometimes we don't even notice the ways it erodes our habitual protective strategies, until one day we find ourselves in a situation that had always made us anxious ! or angry or uptight, and we notice that the anxiety, the anger, or the closed-down quality is gone.

To practice with difficulties, we must leave the mental world and enter the heart of our experience. This means residing in the physical experience of the anxiety and confusion itself, instead of spinning off into thoughts. How does it actually feel to be confused? What is the texture of the experience? Staying with the bodily reality of the present moment offers us the possibility to see our life with a sense of clarity that we could never realize through thinking alone. How long will it take? No one can say. But practicing like this is a good example of going to our edge and working directly with where we're stuck.

One example is working with fear. What do you do with your fears when they arise? Do you usually vacillate between trying to stomp them out and trying to avoid the fearful situation? Most of us do. But when we come to our edge - and what is fear if not the clearest indicator that we're at our edge - we can take the small practice step of choosing to go against our habitual reactions to fear. This is not done with the intention of modifying our behavior by stomping out our fear. Instead, we take the moment to observe and experience as fully as possible what our fear really is. The next time fear arises, see if you can really feel the energy of fear in the body, without doing anything to change it or get rid of it.

Instead of regarding our edge as an enemy, a place to be avoided, we can realize that our edge is actually our path. From this place, we can take a step closer toward what is. But we can do this only one step at a time, persevering through all the ups and downs of our lives. We may sense danger; we might even feel as if death is upon us. However, we don't have to leap in headfirst, going for all or nothing. We can simply take a small step, supported by the knowledge that everyone feels fear in stepping beyond the illusion of comfort.

The real measure of practice is whether, little by little, we can find our edge, that place where we're closed down in fear, and allow ourselves to experience it. This takes courage, but courage isn't about becoming fearless. Courage is the willingness to experience our fears. And as we experience our fears, courage grows. Noticing our edge and trying to meet it also allows us to develop compassion, not just for ourselves but for the whole human drama. Then, with an increasing sense of lightness and curiosity, we can keep moving toward a more open and genuine life.

Love and Attachment

by Goenka, from: Questions and Answers, Attachment

You spoke about non-attachment to things. What about persons?

Yes, persons also. You have true love for the person, compassionate love for this person, this is totally different. But when you have attachment, then you don't have love, you only love yourself, because you expect something -material, emotional etc - from this person. With whomever you have attachment, you are expecting something in return. When you start truly loving this person, then you only give, a one-way traffic. You don't expect anything in return, then the attachment goes. The tension goes. You are so happy.

Precepts, Principles, Rules

by Osho

 Why do you seek precepts and principles? You may not have observed why. It is because with precepts you need not be alert. Suppose I make a precept out of non-violence and then I stick to it, or I make it a precept to be truthful and I stick to it. Then it becomes a habit and there is no need to be alert. I cannot speak lies because a habit, a principle, will always create a barrier.

 Society depends on principles, on inculcating and educating the children with principles. Then they become incapable, really, of being otherwise. If a person becomes incapable, he is dead. Your truth can be alive only if it comes through alertness, not through precepts and principles.

 Each moment, you have to be alert in order to be true. Truth is not a principle; it is something born out of your alertness. Non-violence is not a principle; if you are mindful, you cannot be violent. But, that is difficult. You have to transform yourself. It is easy to live according to principles, rules and regulations. Then you need not worry about being more alert and aware; you can follow the principles. Then you are just like a railway train running on the tracks. Those tracks are your principles. You are not afraid because you cannot miss the path. Really, you don't have any path; you have just iron rails on which your train is running. You will reach the destination, you need not be afraid. You will be asleep and the train will reach it. It is running on dead paths.

 But, practice says that life is not like that, it is more like a river. It is not running on iron rails. The path has not even been charted before. As the river flows, the path is created. The river will reach the sea, and this is how life should be. Life is like a river. There is no pre-charted way; there are no maps to be given to you which are to be followed. Just be alive and alert, and then, wherever life leads, you go with full confidence in it. Trust in the life force. Allow it to lead you towards the sea.

 Just be alert, that is all. While life leads you towards the sea, just be alert so that you don't miss anything. If you are alert, this life will be bliss. The very movement of the river is bliss in itself. Passing through the valleys, through the rocks, falling down from the hills, moving into the unknown is itself bliss. The river is not simply going to meet the sea, it is "growing" to be the sea, and this is possible only through rich experience, alert experiences, moving, trusting. This is the human search. Of course, it is dangerous. If rivers could be run through predetermined paths, there would be less danger, fewer errors. But the whole beauty of aliveness would be lost.

 So don't be a follower of precepts. Just be a creator of more and more awareness. The principles will happen to you, but you will never feel enclosed in them.