Love and Attachment

by Goenka, from: Questions and Answers, Attachment

You spoke about non-attachment to things. What about persons?

Yes, persons also. You have true love for the person, compassionate love for this person, this is totally different. But when you have attachment, then you don't have love, you only love yourself, because you expect something -material, emotional etc - from this person. With whomever you have attachment, you are expecting something in return. When you start truly loving this person, then you only give, a one-way traffic. You don't expect anything in return, then the attachment goes. The tension goes. You are so happy.

On Love

Maitri [metta] is translated as loving kindness, the first element of true love. You love, not because that person is your son, your daughter or your wife. You love, not because he is of the same religious belief as you. You love because that person needs to be loved. That's all. You love without conditions whatsoever. It means unconditional love. You love in order to bring relief to that person, to transform the suffering in that person, to offer joy to her, to offer happiness to her because she needs that. You don't ask for anything in return. You love him because he needs your love. That's all.
Remember:

1. There is only one important time and that is now. The present moment is the only time in which we have power.
2. The most important person is always the person you are with, who is next to you, for who knows if you will have dealings with any other person in the future?
3. The most important thing to do is to make the person at your side happy, for that alone is the pursuit of life.

We talk about social service, service to humanity, helping to bring peace to the world, but often we forget that, first of all, it is the people around us that we must live for. First, help your wife or husband, your child, your parent, your co-worker, your sangha member, your neighbor. Can you make them happy?